I’d tell you to pull a chair up by the fireplace and pour yourself a big glass of egg nog to enjoy these Life Hacks, but didn’t Egg nog and Fire get you in trouble in the first place?

– It’s easy to send Christmas Cards to loved ones, but how about sending a card to an enemy? A really nice one done with a calligraphy pen and with a ziplock bag filled with a fart, sealed tight.

– It’s harder to tie a bow on a turd than one would think.

– If anyone ever asks if you want your payment in a “Lump Sum” say no because you can always get Chinese Food later.

– Aside from Genitals, there is nothing more visually stimulating than paper money on the ground.

– If you ever need to discipline your child at a Walmart, do it in the Toothbrush/toothpaste Aisle because it’s usually empty.

– Isn’t it funny that when you see someone yawn, you feel compelled to yawn too? Wait , not yawning, I meant shoplifting.